Continued nightmare@.@

It's a day again...
20/11/2009, 2am... I couldn't sleep well within these few weeks since october ago. I feel like i'm still under a war, a war which had made me weak...
In last week, i can feel of my mind cant focus on the job, kept thinking of crap. My weird reaction had get attention by Jack, my colleague. zzz... I had bout time didnt experience it.
Yong ting, ur advice kept surrounding at both my ears and brain, and yet, i couldn't did it. Sry... Wat i think is, yong ting had broke friendship with me, yet, i reli appreciate wat she help me, without her, without me. Yong ting's story stopped here.
I call her, msg her, n ask her, yet, she never reply to me, at night. I really worried whether she really accept me as her friend n allowed me to know more bout her? Just now, i have a chit chat with my friend of tat girl i know recently, most of them tell me not to closed with her, due of she's smoker n rude girl, moreover often speak bad words. lol, i dun care of it. Tat's her natural attitude, i like it. But, i wonder she may accept me as her friend or no... She look really like Shu Yee, my ex-supervisor. Look 80% same, also often scold bad word and impolite.
She told me of she read my blog last night, the content said she still consider of we're still strangers. Frankly speaking, i really low confidence to makes better friendship between she and i. These few facts,
1. Living style,
2. Time arrangement,
3. We're dunno our friends as well,
4. She live Puchong meanwhile i live at OUG. I dun have driving license and car also=.=
5. She often didn't reply or call me...
Oh my... I really afraid... Actually i had planned of choose a birthday present for her, but, i scared she dun accept it or even reject me for hang out...